Changing the Story: From Rain to Reconnection 

Perspective is everything:

Over the last few months, I have found out just how true that is. This bit of a rambling story is a reminder that the stories we tell ourselves shape our reality, and changing those stories can transform our lives.

I am mainly writing this for myself, but I’ll probably share, let’s see what happens…

It’s 6.13am on a Saturday morning and I’m awake and hungry to start the day, for the first time in what feels like forever. I feel different than I did yesterday. I feel charged and ready to go. I'm just happier, more alive, ready to run, skip, and jump!"

Reconnecting After Time Apart:

Yesterday, I met a beautiful friend I hadn’t seen in five years. We took our dogs for a walk in the rain at Boxhill.

Michele is a radiator. She gives energy. I can literally feel it coursing through my veins after we’ve spent time together. I leave feeling alive, ready to tackle anything, and just more me. 

She’s magnetic, one of life’s golden girls. She’s lights up a room, she listens and makes you feel seen and heard, her energy that lifts you up. 

We met at university during Freshers' Week, where a brief conversation led me to switch courses to Marine Biology—mainly because she said there were a lot of fit surfers! That was all I needed to hear

We moved in different friendship circles, but we had the same values, the same spirit of adventure We trusted each other quickly, and that bond didn’t need constant contact. We gave each other freedom, knowing we’d always be sounding boards when needed. There was trust, unconditional and effortless. .

After uni, our lives diverged, jobs, kids, relationships, but our friendship stayed intact. Though we spoke less frequently, every conversation remained heartfelt and easy. What I loved most was the freedom to ebb and flow in our friendship, she never pinned me down. I loved this easy ozy relationship. We built each other up, and as we aged, we got grittier and more determined. With every interaction, I felt stronger, bolder, better. She was endlessly fun and always supportive.

The Stories We Tell Ourselves:

But then something changed when I hit my mid-40s. Whether it was menopause or the weight of caring for my mum, I started to feel differently about my beautiful friend.

I wondered why we weren’t in touch as often. I told myself stories—she’d moved on, I wasn’t enough anymore. Not fun enough, not successful enough, not pretty enough. Just not enough. My perspective shifted, and with it, so did I

I became guarded, building invisible walls between us that she never even knew existed. The story I created allowed a decades-old friendship to fade. At the time, I thought I was protecting myself from disappointment, but in hindsight, I see that those walls were only isolating me from someone who was always ready to be there, no questions asked.

Why? Because I made up a story for myself. It was all about ego, me being at the centre.

Then, one day, while I was sitting at my mum’s house during her final days of life, my phone buzzed. It was my friend. Instantly, the walls came down as we connected and shared the sadness. We only spoke briefly in a snatched moment, promising to reconnect again when it was all over.

But as soon as the phone went down, I went back to building the walls, back to feeling sorry for myself. I wish I’d looked outwards. I wish I’d had faith in our friendship. I wish I hadn’t made it all about me.

A year passed, and she called again. I hesitated to pick up, the story I’d constructed so deeply ingrained. Why was she calling? 

The Power of Connection:

But as soon as I heard her voice, those walls crumbled. We shared everything again, our lives, vulnerabilities, no barriers. She was in the middle of a pretty crap time too, but she still showed herself to me. She hadn’t built stupid barriers or made-up stories; she was just moving through life with all its ups and downs and embracing the flow of our long-standing friendship.

And that’s why I’m writing this down. I need to remember that perspective is everything. The years we “missed” were shaped by a false narrative I created. It was my ego, making it all about me, when I should’ve been thinking about us, about what she might have been going through too.

Yesterday, we walked and talked in the pouring rain, walking our doggos, and chewing over all the stuff going on in our lives. We barely scratched the surface. It was great.

We touched on the practice of Core Energy Coaching, and it hit me: the story I told myself was a perfect example of how our energy levels impact our lives

When we’re in a catabolic state—full of fear, doubt, and insecurity—our perspective narrows, and we retreat inward. That’s where I had been, stuck in self-doubt, shielding myself from imaginary hurt. But after meeting my friend, I felt a surge of anabolic energy—possibility, excitement, and freedom. That energy changed everything. I left our time together feeling supercharged, like I always do

The Liberation of Letting Go:

On the drive home, I started thinking about another catabolic state I’ve been stuck in. For about a year, I’ve been in a job that hasn’t lit me up.

My son-in-law recently saw my work badge on the kitchen counter and said, “Woah, Heidi, you look like you’ve had the personality drained out of you here!” He was right. But I hadn’t had the energy to do anything about it.

I’d been stuck in frustration, tolerating a virtual workplace environment just because the pay was good, and the people were nice. But deep down, I knew it wasn’t good for me. I need human contact and face to face connection.

Yesterday, after reconnecting with my friend, my perspective shifted. It was as if I’d been in a metaphorical coma, and our conversation kick-started me back to life.

When I got home, I told my lovely kind boss that I’m leaving.

Wow. That’s what I needed. I feel alive, liberated, and free again! I’m nervous about what’s next, but I’m also excited.

So, if there’s one thing I hope you take away from this is to ask yourself: 

What stories am I telling myself? Are they lifting me up, or are they creating walls?

We have the power to shift our perspective, to reconnect, and to choose energy that makes us feel alive. Sometimes, all it takes is a good conversation and the courage to change.

The sun is shining today, I think it’s a sign!